Eason and his father

[Berri]

Eason Chan with father Chan Kau Tai, A Father's Day interview

A father is the softest side of a man. A man may seem mean and unapproachable but he will always show his soft side in front of his child(ren.) This coming Father's Day, most children will be spending their time with their fathers. Eason Chan on the other hand will be working outside of Hong Kong and won't be able to spend the day with his father. To make up for this, Eason brought his father Chan Kau Tai to Big Wave Bay Beach in Hong Kong Island, where they haven't been to in over 10 years, to enjoy the beautiful beach view and have a heart to heart, father to son interview.

At the young age of 12, Eason's father sent Eason overseas to England for school. Eason learned to be independent but he missed the good times in Hong Kong. Thinking back to the days before he left Hong Kong, Eason most remembers his father dragging the lazy Eason and his brother up from bed early in the morning and driving them to Big Wave Bay Beach in Hong Kong Island.

This Father's Day, Eason will be working in India and won't be spending it with his father. So before he leaves for India he spent the day with his father at Big Wave Bay Beach in Hong Kong Island. A beach they haven't been to in over 10 years. They took a slow stroll along the beach and when it started to rain Eason opened up an umbrella to blocked the rain and wind from hitting his father. It was a sweet and caring moment, no wonder Eason's father says, "In the past I would have Eason listen to me when I lecture him, now its my turn to listen to him. This is what you call 'listening to your son at an old age' (lo loy chung ji) but there's one thing I dislike, its when he talks and talks but never gets to the point. He'll going around and around in circles but never get to the point which is why I will stop him and say 'Get to the point!.' Now that I've said it so many times he'll get to the point quickly when he speaks to me."

Chan Kau Tai has always been a strict father to his two sons. All decisions were made and approved by him. This strict behavior went on for many years and whenever his two sons felt their father was being unfair they would always go to their mother and complain which caused their father-son relationship to turn in the wrong direction. Even with his strict behavior Eason always loved his father and always hoped his father will act more like a friend so Eason can talk to him about his problems and not have decisions already made for him. Eason says, "Recently I heard a story from a friend regarding his nephew which made me realize that children just want their parents to listen to their problems and not solve the problems for them. To have a good relationship with your child you need to give them space and just listen to them. Now when I talk with Constance (Eason's daughter) I have to have a lot of patience and listen to everything she has to say unlike the relationship with my father in the past where only he spoke and I never got to speak." Upon hearing his sons feelings Chan Kau Tai jokes, "This is the thanks you get for raising a child. Now that Eason's a father himself he realizes all these things. In the past, I've always made the decisions for my sons thinking they didn't know whats best for themselves, that I'm doing whats best for them, and they had to listen to what I say. Which is very controlling but at the time they never spoke back to me which led me to think I was doing the correct thing and my sons were very disciplined children. But now I realize that they were thinking differently."

Back in the days Chan Kau Tai was the Chief Engineer of the Housing Department of Hong Kong and always hoped his sons would become architects which is why early on he already organized he routes his sons would be taking. He says, "Back at the time, I purposely organized it so he (Eason) would study architecture in England. At first I thought he really enjoyed it and after he finished his degree he would return to Hong Kong and work as a intern architect. Then I realized all along I was the only one that thought this way and what he enjoyed was singing. At the time I was extremely against it, I thought how would he ever be successful being a singer? Because of this we had many heated arguments but he never gave up on singing and didn't listen to me when I told him to return to England and finish his degree. I was very angry and frustrated about this. It wasn't until after he won his first singing award and when his success in the singing industry grew that I was no longer frustrated and stopped opposing his dream to be in the singing industry."

Actually, Chan Kau Tai enjoys singing also and thinks that he's a pretty good singer himself but, if he had to compare himself with his son he says, "When it comes to singing skills his is better than mine. Today, seeing his success in the industry I feel very proud and it proves his persistance to continue singing was correct."

Chan Kau Tai feels that Eason's love and care towards his father is 100% and there isn't much he can complain about. One thing Chan Kau Tai feels Eason lacks is EQ, he feels that Eason should be able to control his attitude better. Eason who was sitting right next to his father quickly opposes to his father's views, stating, "Many successful artists have big attitude problems and anger outbursts. I think it's a way to relieve stress and balance your emotions. If I have to keep my angry emotions inside I will lose my true self. All my friends know that I am a straight-foward person and I hate being fake."

Actually, towards friends and family Eason rarely has anger outbursts. It is only towards reporters that follow his family around that Eason has anger outbursts at. Eason explains, "I don't like it when reporters bother my family. I know that in this business this will happen but if you need to follow someone and take pictures of someone, it should be me and not my family."

As for this year's Father's Day Chan Kau Tai expresses that its okay that Eason won't be spending it with him, he says, "Its be so many years, this holiday isn't so important anymore. As long as my two sons will continue on with their lives happily then I'll be happy. My wishes are really simple, I only hope that every time he (Eason) leaves Hong Kong for work, when he arrives at his working grounds he'll give me a call so I know he's safe. Like the most recent time he worked outside of Hong Kong, he called me and told me he's there. As long as I know he's safe, I'm happy."